Death Note

One Day, a guy name Shaun Dhenesh was walking to a nearby supermarket.On the way there he was shocked to see something drop down out of no where.He then picked it up and he found a notebook named Death Note. He was so happy to find that book that he ran back home and locked the door.After that he happily opened the book and memorised the instruction.To prevent anyone from accidently taking his book , he proudly write his name down the Death Note Book so that people wont mistaken take his book. Yeah then he died 40 seconds after that.

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• Shinigami:SHIT!!! i should pick a better person next time

Bus Driver

• A little kid walks into a city bus and sits right behind the driver and starts yelling, ''If my dad was a bull and my mom a cow I'd be a little bull.''
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• The driver starts getting mad at the noisy kid, who continues with, ''If my dad was an elephant and my mom a girl elephant I would be a little elephant.''
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• The kid goes on with several animals until the bus driver gets angry and yells at the kid, ''What if your dad was a drunk and your mom was a prostitute?''
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• The kid smiles and says, ''I would be a bus driver!''

A Talk With A Clown

• Had a chat with a clown,when he was making balloon for kids.
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• Me:Hi
• Clown:Hi
• Me:Where did you get those big red shoes?special order one?
• Clown: No lar i dint buy one
• Me:Then how u get it?
• Clown:Dehh!!that day me and ronald mcdonald had a fight mah,we bet who can fight better , then i won , he no money to pay so i stole his shoes lor.
• Me:oh i see @_@''

Kamikaze

• Wood joined the suicide bomber squad,
• so when he is given a mission to
• suicide in the enemies camp. His
• leader supply him a lot of weapons and
• bombs stacked to his body and mobile
• for communications.
• He lands up in the enemy's camp,
• called his boss: Sir, there are 2
• enemies soldier, can I suicide now?
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• Leader: No, not for two, wait till you
• see more soldiers.
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• Wood: Sir now there are 25 can I do
• it now?
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• Boss: Wait for more.
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• Wood: Sir, now I am in a midst of 150
• soldiers, can I suicide now?
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• Boss: Yes, go ahead, you will be a
• martyr, don't worry about your family,
• we will look after.
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• Wood pulls out his knife..
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• ..and stabs himself in the chest

My God

• Four Catholic ladies are having coffee together,
• discussing how important their children are.
• The first one tells her friends, "My son is a priest.
• When he walks into a room, everyone calls him
• 'Father'."
• The second Catholic woman chirps, "Well, my son is a
• bishop. Whenever he walks into a room, people say,
• 'Your Grace'."
• The third Catholic woman says smugly, "Well, not to
• put you down, but my son is a cardinal. Whenever he
• walks into a room, people say 'Your Eminence'."
• The fourth Catholic woman sips her coffee in silence.
• The first three women give her this subtle "Well...?"
• She replies, "My son is a gorgeous, 6' 2", hard bodied,
• well hung, male stripper. Whenever he walks into a
• room, women say, "My God..."

What Will You Bring In Space?

• Got 3 person will go to space with the 1st Malaysia's rocket,3 of them are taking different things to space:
• 1.He brought lots of Candy that can last for 3 years.
• 2.He took a beautiful girl with him.
• 3.He brought many cigar and tobacco with him that can last for 3 years.
• After 3 years when they are back the reporter ask them what are there feelings:
• 1.I'm sad cause i am diabetic now.
• 2.I'm happy cause I get a baby boy.
• 3.WHAT THE SHIT...I forgot to take a lighter to space.

Its Not Good To Boast

There were once 2 friend that bought a new binocular but different brand.Wood and Shaun was good friend. Wood boasted to Shaun"heh", your binocular is useless. I can see what you do with your wife on bed last night with my binocular!". Shaun replied calmly"haihzzzz, if your binocular is so good, you should see that's not my wife,............BUT YOURS!!!"